Improve Your Marriage by Staying a Couple

Do you remember when you and your spouse were dating? It seemed as if you both couldn’t get enough of each other. You most likely spent time holding hands, smiling at each other, whispering in one another’s ears and all kinds of small little actions that kept your love exciting and new. Once a couple becomes married, they tend to stop doing those loving things after some time. Life becomes busy- you’re walking too fast to get somewhere to hold hands, she knows you love her so you don’t think you have to tell her, she might be offended if you order for her at a restaurant and so on. It is very easy to fall out of the habits of ‘couples’. It can be just as easy to fall back in the habit if you give it a try.

When you go anywhere together, start putting your arm in his or take her arm and enter that way- enter as a couple. Even before that, make sure you never walk without holding his or her hand. Take a look at elderly couples that have obviously been married a long time. They still hold hands.

After living together for some time, it is most likely that you have accumulated some of the same types of clothing. Intentionally match your outfits now and then! If you don’t want to go that far, buy matching coats or caps and wear those when you are out together. It doesn’t have to be every time you leave the house, but every once in a while should be fun!

When you take your wife out, it’s still okay to do the traditional things men used to do for women. Although feminism is very real and should be taken seriously, there is nothing wrong with holding the door open for your wife or pulling her chair out for her to sit at the table. These are not signs of a weak woman who cannot do it herself. You are showing her respect each time that you make a gesture like that.

Flirt subtly with each other whenever you feel like it! You don’t have to be out to dinner or at a party to flirt with each other. Do it at home while you’re cleaning the kitchen or while he or she’s reading a book. Walk by and whisper their pet name in their ear or plant a kiss on his or her neck. Make eye contact and wink or offer a seductive smile. Take the initiative and do what comes naturally.

For those who are uncomfortable with public displays of affection or even private displays of affection, give it a try. If you find that you are unable to enjoy little attempts at being affectionate, you might want to seek counseling to discover why it makes you feel that way. If you and your spouse are happy without that type of affection, more power to you but it is unlikely that both of you are content. It doesn’t hurt to try and the worst that can happen is that you might actually like it!

Define your marriage: Companionship or a Love Affair?

Every marriage is just like any relationship.  They have their ups and downs, agreements and disagreements and good days and bad days.  When you put two people from different backgrounds with different ideas, feelings and expectations together, you simply can’t expect everything to be wonderful all of the time!  While some marriages have very serious problems that can only be solved by intense focus and even therapy, most marriages simply become ‘stale’ or uninteresting. 

It is important to reflect on exactly what is causing any conflict or uneasiness in a marriage before acting on it.  In a great many marriages, the excitement and ‘take my breath away’ feelings are fading or they are even gone.  It doesn’t mean that the love is gone.  Love sometimes needs a little stimulation in order to revisit and maintain the feelings we all crave and yearn for.  That stimulation is called ‘romance.’

Many people mistake a marriage that seems to be ordinary or unexceptional as lacking love.  It simply isn’t the case!  Most marriages do not lack love, but they do lack romance!  Love is easy and peaceful, while romance is what makes a relationship hot and arousing. 

Every single person on earth in any type of relationship desires passion and romance in his or her life.  Unfortunately, there are a few things about romance most people don’t understand.  The most common problem in creating romance in a relationship is that people simply don’t know how to do it!  Other times, people are fixed in cultural classifications and their partners are unable to appreciate them for their own special and unique qualities.  Ultimately, some people have simply given up on their search for romance.

In a time where everything is convenient and available almost at the touch of a button, the effort of romance seems as if it takes a good deal of effort.  It is very possible to take some old-fashioned romantic ideas and make them work in a modern world while maintaining the genuine intention behind each thought and act.  Romance today can be filled with unique ideas, creativity and passion.  Romance is simply the way you express your love for another person.  It is vital to keeping love fresh, exciting and alive.  Without romance, love can become tiresome and even worse.

The expression of love through romance keeps it alive, fun and worthwhile.  Romance is only true, though, when carried out with no ulterior motives.  The only reason romance should be initiated is in an attempt to show love and appreciation.  Romance with true intentions is when you want to show your mate that you are thinking about them and they matter enough to make the effort to bring your love to life through action.

Romance is more like an artistic creation as opposed to an exact science.  Those who tend to feel competitive in almost everything they do will need to check that attitude at the door when initiating romance.  Love and romance should not be considered a contest that should be outdone time and again.  It should be considered a cooperative activity.  While love and romance take two in order to work, you can be extremely romantic while still keeping your individuality.  Love and romance make perfect partners and can make you and your partner ‘perfect’ companions as well!